CHARLIE

Charlie was nothing special at least in his own eyes, a handyman in a small village surrounded by green, lush fields rolling hills streams a brook and a good fishing lake. The village itself consists of 1 Hall 1 school 1 Church and a corner shop that sells everything you need and the things you don’t, a pub at each end The Lamb and The Lion both homely and welcoming to all (locals) and maybe 40 houses in total with 3 farms in the local area.

Now if anything broke from toaster to tractor and every lightbulb in between, you would just call for Charlie, he’d turn up with his horse N’ cart and in no time at all you’d have a fixed thing. Everyone loves Charlie and in turn Charlie loved them too even Farmer Smith of Eastvile Farm who was a grumpy old sod most of the time.

The village named Little Farthing was ideal a picture perfect place, no need for a Miss Marple or Jessica Fletcher here and don’t even mention DCI Barnaby. Not a single crime had occurred in Little Farthing in over 200 years and that was just a scuffle over the ownership of a cow, which was soon resolved over a good steak dinner.

Anyway lets jump back to the present shall we, its 2pm on 29 May in the year of your reading this. Charlie has just been called out to the Hall by Beth (a local beauty, and the Vicars wife). Some floor boards were loose and needed fixing down or changing before Zumba starts at 3:30. So along Charlie went to the hall and set to work, at first he tried nails, still the board wouldn’t settle so he tried screws to the same effect. There was nothing for it Charlie would have too change the boards. He fetched what he needed from his cart and went back into the hall, Beth called out “ cuppa Charlie?” Yes please he replied.

Charlie used his pry-bar and claw hammer to lift the board, then stood back in shock dropping his tools, at the same time Beth came to his side with a mug of tea, the mug joined the tools on the floor breaking as Beth let out a ear piercing scream, at this Charlie put his arms around Beth to support her and to be honest help himself as well. They both now stood silent in the middle of the hall looking into the hole left by the missing floor board, what they saw was no great treasure no horrible infestation of vermin oh no these Charlie could of dealt with.

Sticking up from a pile of Magic-tree air freshers quite clearly were the bloated bodies of two children, the bloating had been what forced the old boards to bulge and come loose.

Charlie’s resolve retuned as he stepped away from Beth and knelt by the hole, as he reached in to turn the nearest body to see if he new the child, the body burst at the middle releasing a very pungent gas, Charlies heaving masked the approaching footsteps, Beth screamed again and failed to notice the Pry-bar being lifted.

CLANG Beth fell to the floor dead. At the sound of the falling body Charlie turned and stood, thinking Beth had just fainted, at first he just saw her body blood pooling around her head, a shadow stepped closer, Charlie looked up into the face of Chris, Beths husband. All went black after Charlie was also hit with the Pry-bar.

The hall floor looks good as new as the Zumba class dances over the now four bodies and a lot more magic-trees.

Rumour has it that Beth and Charlie ran off together after starting an affair some time ago, the whole village has rallied round to support Chris Their loving victor in his time of need….

Fin